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Posts in category Everyday Life

Ruminating

Apr25
2008
Kristi Written by Kristi
To be, or not to be: that is the question:
Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them? To die: to sleep:
No more; and by a sleep to say we end
The heartache and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to,–‘t is a consummation
Devoutly to be wish’d. To die, to sleep;
To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there’s the rub:
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come,
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause: there’s the respect
That makes calamity of so long life;
For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
The oppressor’s wrong, the proud man’s contumely,
The pangs of despised love, the law’s delay,
The insolence of office and the spurns
That patient merit of the unworthy takes,
When he himself might his quietus make
With a bare bodkin? who would fardels bear,
To grunt and sweat under a weary life,
But that the dread of something after death,
The undiscover’d country from whose bourn
No traveller returns, puzzles the will
And makes us rather bear those ills we have
Than fly to others that we know not of?
Thus conscience does make cowards of us all;
And thus the native hue of resolution
Is sicklied o’er with the pale cast of thought,
And enterprises of great pith and moment
With this regard their currents turn awry,
And lose the name of action.

 

William Shakespeare, “Hamlet”, Act 3 scene 1

The House of Fate, cont.

Apr23
2008
Rob Written by Rob

Some time back, I posted this Emerson quote on R&K. At the time, things were weighing heavily on my mind – the choices we make, why we do things, how eventually we become the product of our own choices. Whether we want to or not.

“But these shocks and ruins are less destructive to us, than the stealthy power of other laws which act upon us daily. An expense of ends to means is fact; — organization tyrannizing over character. The menegerie, of forms and powers of the spine, is a book of fate: the bill of the bird, the skull of the snake, determines tyrannically its limits. So is the scale of races, of temperaments; so is sex; so is climate; so is the reaction of talents imprisoning the vital power in certain directions. Every spirit makes its house; but afterwards the house confines the spirit.”

– Ralph Waldo Emerson, “Fate”, 1860

Two days ago, a 44-year-old man died in an Orlando bathroom. Neither of us knew him personally; I only knew of him. He very nearly almost married one of my best friends, almost ten years ago now. He had problems, even then, but as I’d heard the story, over the years since he’d steadily been rolling downhill. Burning bridges, antagonizing friends and family, finally settling into a very unhappy marriage and a serious alcohol problem. My friend stayed close with his family, and so she received news updates every so often about him and how his life was going.

He made a lot of bad choices. A lot of them. By the time they found him, he’d just about hit the end anyway. His family couldn’t stand him; no wife, kids, or prospects; no career to speak of; no real education; a substance abuse problem. Right now we don’t know whether it was natural causes, or if he took his own life. Even if it was natural, though, there are many ways to speed one’s exit from this world if one is so inclined. No matter how you cut it, he became the product of his own shortsighted choices.

It’s just so sad.

He’s been a regular topic of conversation around here this week. No one deserves to die like that: alone, miserable, still young and out of options. It’s caused us both to reflect on our own choices, people we’ve known, how lots of little decisions all led us to this place in time. And how grateful we are for the lives we have.

Of Time, Stuff In Bondage And Cat Poo

Apr02
2008
Rob Written by Rob

Time’s blasting along now. It just doesn’t seem like THAT long ago – nothing like the six months it’s been – since I first flew out to Modesto for a week in October. Or since Kristi was visiting me in Orlando. Now we’re in April, which means in just three months we’ll be man and wife. We’re both looking forward to it, but wow, time’s just flying.

The wedding plans are pretty much complete now. We’re doing engagement photos in a couple weeks, there’s still the cake to sort out, and other odds and ends, but the bulk of our planning now has shifted from the wedding to the honeymoon. Those plans seem to change every day, but that’s fine. We still have plenty of time to decide on that.

In the meantime, we’ve finally almost settled all the outstanding business from my move. Still a bit here and there left to do, nothing major, just things we haven’t gotten around to doing yet. The biggest outstanding issue is probably the storage unit.

I left Orlando pretty quickly, and we didn’t really have the money or time to ship all my belongings to California. So a lot of my stuff ended up with the Salvation Army, my family, or in the garbage. The rest currently resides in a 10×10′ aluminum room in east Orlando: my bike, a 27″ Sony TV, my beloved office chair, boxes full of books and office files and other assorted materials. My brother and I packed it all in, and then I basically just stuffed a couple bags full of day-to-days and got on the plane. I arrived in Modesto literally with the clothes on my back.

So lately I’ve been missing my stuff, especially the books. I have some really good books. So we’re enlisting my brother’s help once again to wander over to the unit and start shipping the boxes over. We don’t have much of a choice about the big stuff, the TV and bike and whatnot.. that’s going to have to shipped heavy. But at least we can start liberating some of the easy stuff from Orlando bondage.

BTW.. have I mentioned lately how much I love my wife (to be)? Well, I do. A lot.

And she got a lot more sympathy from me this morning on an issue of vital importance: the early-morning stench of a freshly dropped Tuck turd. Every morning we have a routine around here. Alarm goes off, Kristi gets up for work, hits the shower, Tuck follows her into the bathroom and chooses that moment to plant a fat juicy one in his corner of the floor. Kristi starts screaming “BABE!!” which is then my cue to get my lazy ass out of bed, throw on slippers and rush into the bathroom at 6am to quickly dispose of it before she faints or worse.

By the time I get into the bathroom, I mean, come on, the smell isn’t THAT bad. It stinks, but aren’t we overdramatizing it slightly?

Turns out, no, we’re not. Tuck waited this morning and instead dropped his load when I was in the shower, and OH MY GOD WHAT THE HECK IS THAT SMELL?!! Does the steam just amplify it?? The wall of nastiness was.. oh god.. hold breath.. hope it passes.. sweet god in heaven.. it took a couple minutes before the smell got back down to where it usually is by the time I wander into the bathroom for cleanup.

That girl must really love me. Starting her workday every morning to that. There just no way I can ever let that kind of dedication get away.

Posted in Romance, The Animals

The Daily Grind

Mar31
2008
Kristi Written by Kristi

We’re back from San Diego and returned to work today.  Blah.  Not that fun after 10 days to work around the house, run errands, travel, hang out and sleep in.  I’m as bad as my students when it comes to not remembering what we’ve worked on before the break.  They’re catching up but man, my brain has taken a while to engage this morning. 

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