Respite

I’m pretty certain I’m done being a teacher.  It’s been probably 3 years coming, since I came home from England.  I wasn’t certain when I came back that I even wanted to teach again but I needed to do something to earn money.  And get out of the house.

But now… things have gone from bad to worse and I’m almost sure I’m at the end of the this phase of my life.   I still love working with kids.  It’s not about my students.  It’s all the bullshit.  Education just isn’t fun anymore.  Teaching isn’t challenging anymore.  State adopted textbooks have sucked all the creativity out of teaching.  Standards mean we have to do things a certain way, cover specific skills and content on a scheduled pace.  Uniformity means I don’t have to exercise my brain at all.

But mostly, I’m tired.  I’m tired of the ridiculous nature of what is expected of me.

Wanted, college-educated individuals who are willing to put in excessively long hours without commensurate compensation; who can work under adverse conditions, with unappreciative supervisors and even more unappreciative clients, many of whom prefer to be uninvolved, as well; who do not mind having inadequate resources and support services; who agree to assume unspecified responsibilities without prior notification; but who will be held accountable for the satisfaction and performance of the unappreciative and uninvolved clients. Candidates for the positions also must be willing to receive inadequate wages and expect not to be able to double their income in constant dollars in a lifetime. Applicants are encouraged to send resumes to the Teacher Employment Office of the ___________School. (Adapted from a want ad idea of Linda Darling-Hammond 1983) (Dworkin 2001).

This is teaching in 2009, as much as it was in 1983.  And right now? I can’t do it anymore and still maintain my sanity and self-worth.  I don’t know what I will do now but this isn’t it.