Some days, it feels like I’m firing on all cylinders. Everything is going well. I’m creating nice product, being a loving, attentive wife, creating a delicious dinner for us, remembering to brush my hair, scoring 65 points in Words with Friends.
And then some days? Eh. Not so much. I’ve been struggling off and on for the last few weeks with a nagging ear infection that won’t seem to go away completely. I’m ok for one or 2 days and then my ear is clogged again and painful. It makes it hard to concentrate on doing anything well. I’m not particularly a great friend today and nothing really interests me at the moment. I’m having a hard time being inspired to create anything pretty or interesting or even useful, never mind inspired.
I know there is more to my malaise than just being physically off. The time change, the weather turning shockingly cold all of the sudden, the stress of knowing my husband is slammed with work and I can’t do much to help ease his burden. Trying to rediscover passions.. what I love. I’ve lost a bit of the plot, I guess.
This isn’t about being ungrateful or whining. I’m blessed with wonderful people in my life, friends, family, a supportive network of people who love and care for us. And I’m thankful for them all, even the ones who sometimes piss me right off sometimes. I just need to rediscover the spring in my step, the careless abandon that used to make me dance around the kitchen. I’ll get there. Just might take me a bit of time.