There are times I go back to 2009 in my head. I relive the same few days. Did I do the right things? Did I say everything I could have? Why didn’t I fight harder for myself? And Rob reminds me that I did everything I could, that I fought for myself the only way I could, that there isn’t anything I should’ve done differently. When I get nostalgic for teaching, I remind myself how bone-wearyingly tired I was at the end. Four years on, I still get tired thinking of it.
My weekends now are relaxing, peaceful. My time is, for the most part, my own. I can make appointments for any time of the day. I can have lunch with my husband. I can sleep until 10am, work in my pjs until 3pm, and eat cereal at noon. We can go on vacation any month of the year, for a length of time we determine. There are no papers to grade, conferences to attend, and completely incompetent administrators who behave out of spite. I can do interesting things and not have to worry about if today is the day I get the chop.
And so there is no real deep longing to be back in the classroom. This time of the year is always a reminder of who I used to be, who I no longer am, and who I have become.
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84 days until Kauai.
I just sent recently sent in my resignation from my job as teacher/counsellor at my school. It’s not a healthy place, and a lot of long time teachers/staff wish that they could leave but feel like they have on golden handcuffs (have a child at the school, or know that they won’t be paid as well in the UK for this work). I’m scared half to death about the unknown and whether I’ll make it as a private therapist (I’m hopefully getting more training), but I’m also very excited about it as well…the relief of knowing that I won’t be under a microscope with people waiting for my next small mistake is palpable. I’m so happy to read that you are in a good place.
Liane, I know how scary it is! But whatever path you choose will lead you on some great adventures. I didn’t know you were considering leaving but sometimes, it’s just taking the leap that’s scarier than the journey afterward.
Kristi, I haven’t visited this page in some time. I know you miss teaching on some level because it defined you early on. You were GREAT at it and cared. Life is about stepping outside your comfort zone, I’m really proud of you and Rob. You two make a great team.
Thanks Em.. I appreciate your kind words.